i am become ass at the walls of troy

I have recently come into possession of a rare Captain Ahab CD-R, i am become ass.



This CD-R was 'made in conjunction with the summer 2005 "Ass Holocaust" tour with Rose for Bodhan'. This is sort of a transitional EP, 7 tracks in length. Moving from the less overt The Sex is Next to masterwork of After the Rain my Heart Still Dreams, i am become ass is the chrysalis stage of the Ahab butterfly.

The Tracks:

1. Your Body is a Wonderland- This cover is a poppy string of almost childish synth lines and electronic beeps. Julie (my wife) hates the original and this version is pretty funny.
2. I Can't Believe It's Not Booty (Radio edit)- The idea that this song would ever be played on radio is hilarious. Check out the single version on the 2nd video in my Valentine's Day post. This version replaces all the F-bombs with the word Love. The keys are also more lo-fi and the secondary keyboard part is much more pronounced. This track is completely great.
3. Sk8er Boi- Before there was Girlfriend their was that other amazing Avril song. This cover could be some terrible serious attempt to make this song techno workout/dance music. This song starts to show Captain Ahab's ability to walk the line of irony so silently that the casual passerby might not notice it.
4. This Music Sucks- A song that rips on its own genre for almost 5 minutes. The drum & bass brakes down in the middle for a noise & vocals tirade. Brilliant.
5. Climate Control Abe Lincoln vs. Fairy Princess Ballerina Bride (Live)- An electronic instrumental with "announcing" of what sounds like a pro wrestling match, this is a song that seems to be almost 100% based on being there. Why does this work for me? It's a horror trick, that what you don't see can be scarier than what you do see. Same deal here, with funnier being the operative word.
6. Goliath!- This is a narrative about David and Goliath mostly sung from Goliath's point of view. This reminds me of old comic books or Saturday cartoons where the bad guy constantly brags of their own evil. Goliath boasts about being a "befouler of the land" and a "metaphor of selfishness" and "proud to be uncircumcised"; while the Philistines refer to themselves as godless. Good stuff.
7. The Captain Ahab Megalomaniamix- This is probably my favorite track. It's an almost 16 minute mix that highlights past achievements and alludes to what would be their very bright future.

I am now eagerly awaiting the first package from the fan club that should come out soon. Of course, I can't wait for their next full length The End of Irony.

I was going to review the latest Incredible Hercules but its been out for a week now so I'm just going to link to this post (and this one and this one) that sums up everything I wanted to say and has prettier scans. If you've wondered why I have links to fashion blogs on my page here, i think this should clarify. Modern "high fashion" consists mostly of costumes. Inspiration for this line seems to have come from the Adam West Batman series of yore.

The new heroclix set, Crisis, comes out today!

#1 want: Klarion!

Also coming out that I'm getting: Batman, Elephantmen: War Toys 2, Kick-Ass and Young Avengers Presents 2. Yeah!

Tiny Post

Tiny post today.

This week saw the debut of Tiny Titans from DC comics. I got this because it s ridiculously cute.



For the most part I was satisfied. It is a book of vignettes of a bunch of the teen titans as kids in elementary school. It's no Mini Marvels, but what is? My favorite Tiny Titan??

Ravager

Now, I'm not really any kind of fan of her mainstream counterpart, but "Rose" is great with the baby blue eye patch. Her shtick so far is embarrassment, as she is the daughter of new principal Deathstroke.

My favorite story was this 2-pager




GOLD! The classic 60s Titans are my favorites, and they are well represented here. Anyway, this is a cute comic, well worth $2.25, and I'll keep picking it up.

I subscribe to a few "Song-of-the-day" podcasts and MPR's "The Current Song of the Day" has consistently been the least exciting. Nevertheless, today's offering I liked. From Minneapolis band Skoal Kodiak, "Harpie" has a good, head bobbing groove, based on a constantly modulating distorted bass (or synth?) line. The vocals are so distorted they offer no discernible lyrics. The effect is kind of like one of the funkier Bjork tracks you might hear.


FRIDAY!

VICE LUVVIN': 2 Sure Shots For The Season

Vice Cooler (of HAWNAY TROOF fame) recently posted a DJ set he did in Europe. Here is his description. "CREW--- I was recentally invited to do a Dj set in the bavarian town of Nurnburg. The crowd was full of people wanting to heard 50 cent's boring slow jams and instead they got me spinning quite the opposite." This is an awesome mix and great party/hang out music. Download it from his blog at the HAWNAY TROOF MySpace page in the Blog section. I'm not sure if you need to be on MySpace to download it, but it is totally worth it. There is also a new remix of his song "Out of Teen" that is awesome. And if you don't already have Dollar & Deed you are completely missing out. Actually, go download this mixtape right now and then buy all of his releases.

Photo by Clare L. Evans

Looking for a good comic to read or buy for your Valentine??? Try this one.

I don't care if you have been married forever or you fear love or you hate everything Valentine's Day has become, this is still a good Valentine's read. I can't imagine what kind of person wouldn't appreciate this book. Buy it, read it, give it to someone, anything. Most major book chains probably have this in stock right now, but check with your local comic store first. It's fun and romantic and excitng and violent and fast and beautifully done by Osamu Tezuka. Just do it.

Oh, and check out the last weeks Dollar Bin show "Comic Book Couples" for some extra fun.

TO ME, MY BIRD! Golden, Silver, etc.

In this issue:
Smashing Pumpkins "Zeitgeist"
High Places "Golden"
Del tha Funkee Homosapien live in Anchorage, AK
But first...


Silver Surfer #8 from Marvel Comics. Firstly, I'd like to point out how there is nobody on Earth who would pass up a chance to buy this comic based on the cover. Even better, this actually is what the comic is like!

The Silver Surfer, riding a giant silver bird, battling a dragon with an octopus head, in the death-grip of the beast's jaws yelling, "TO ME, MY BIRD!" I read this issue that I had been saving for a while in response to the craving i got to read a real Silver Surfer story after seeing Fantastic Four 2. This comic from February of 1988 was written by Steve Englehart, penciled and colored by Marshall Rogers, and inked by Joe Rubinstein. Englehart and Rogers are famous for a pretty long run on the batman books that include the masterful "Joker Fish" story. Anyhow, these guys aren't pulling any punches in this story, which is an insane head trip from page 1:

Surfer lounges at home reading the paper and asks Shalla-Bal where his pipe and slippers are. She thinks they might be under the rat. The silver rat in the corner there.We find out over the next few pages that she was right and he proceeds to smoke his teeny tiny slippers and sit in his giant pipe. You'll notice Shalla in a stylish FF outfit here (is Norrin secretly into Sue? Johnny?) but on the next page she is wearing her traditional outfit, then Mantis' costume, then she is Mantis, and then some Kree bust in his door and tell him they don't like the way he thinks! The nerve. Good thing the silver rat saves his butt at this point, and surfer escapes. He is pursued by some Kree with very stylish facial hair.

Good thing for our hero, he knows who he is...


He's a naked dude riding a silver dog. From here, we watch the former herald become increasingly self-aware, until he realizes that he is unconscious and being experimented on by the Kree and the Supreme Intelligence , who is manifesting in the Surfer's mind as the octo-dragon thingy. This issue clearly has some build up from previous issues, and has a interspersed tertiary plot about Shalla-Bal, but it still works completely on its own. In the climax, SS summons his board from his unconscious state, awakens, surfs through the Supreme Intelligence , and snatches the soul gem on the way. w00000000000!!!!! This is something you would enjoy if you like Seth Fisher. 10/10!

From Silver to "Golden", High Places have recently released a new song on their MySpace Page. "Golden" is a great track that is distinctly High Places, while bringing something distinctly new to the table. It seems maybe 'dancier' despite having a less formal beat and less distinguishable lyrics than previous releases. best of all this is a song from an upcoming full length release. Yay! I like this song a bunch. And it's free.

In other High Places news, they were featured in the last ever issue of Punk Planet magazine, and they have a 7" coming out as a joint release by CAFF/FLICK and Reverse Retro (who were also in that same issue of Punk Planet). I've heard the tracks and they are both great. Band of the future, Today!

And then there was Smashing Pumpkins come back album "Zeitgeist". I don't want to dwell to much on this, because really, it sucks. Maybe more accurately, it's boring. What was so bold and awesome 10-15 years ago is now so stale and safe. Hard rock is the new adult-contemporary. I do like some of the tracks. The stand outs are Doomsday Clock, 7 Shades of Black, and Tarantula. On a proper Pumpkins album, these tracks would be filler, but the entire album is so homogeneous you could only have at most two of these in a good mix. This album is for your uncle who likes to listen to rock and roll in a completely safe way, and pretend he's rockin' out while he flips burgers. There is just no life in it.

I got the chance to see Del tha funkee homosapien this past week. I had a bunch of fun, but I'd say I was a little let down by Del's set. This is due probably to nothing other than my own unrealistically high expectations. I saw lots of people there, including Van Sanders, who is the first person to introduce me to Del about 10 years ago. Pretty much every cool person over 21 (and a few under) was there. Tons of fun. Thanks goes to Heather.

I'd like to talk about a lot more, but I'm outta time. Blogging is hard, and I'm sorry if I have ever been upset with anyone for not getting one out on time. Thanks for reading, leave me a comment if I figure out how to enable that.

It Begins!!!!!!!!!!

MORTAL KOMBAT!!!!!

Anyway, this is my first blog, and may theoretically be the home of a future podcast. I'm going to focus on two subjects, music (mostly of the underground or Alaskan varieties) and comics (mostly of every variety). I'm really interested in both, so you probably are too, right? Maybe I'll come up with a two font color system so you can skip the stuff you don't care about. I'm 22, married, parent of a 3 year old boy and a 2 week old boy. I'm in 2 active bands, 4 that will probably never perform or play together again, and I've got a project in mind to hopefully be ready in the next few months.

TEST YOUR MIGHT!!!!!

I guess I'll try a real first post to compliment that introductory stuff. Lets choose our font colours:

comics music
comics music
comics music
comics music
comics music
comics music
comics music


comics music looks pretty good to me. Open to opinions.


I guess I'll start with comics today. Today I bought All-Star Superman #8 by Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely. Totally awesome. Unrelentingly. My favorite part was the bizarro national anthem, as sung by Le-Roj!!!

"NO SAY, AM NO SEE BY AM NIGHT'S EARLY DARK! HOW SHAMEFULLY QUIET BY AM MORNING'S FIRST FADING! THIN STRIPES AND DULL STARS THROUGH THE COMFORTABLE PEACE, UNDER TRENCHES NO WATCH, AM SO CRAVENLY HANGING! BY NO ROCKET'S BLUE SHADE AM NO SHELLS DEAD DOWN THERE, GAVE NO PROOF ALL DAY LONG THAT THE FLAG WAS UNWHERE! NO SAY DOES AM SPAR-STRANGLED SHROUD HANG LIMPLY! UNDER LAND OF NO FREE! AM US HOME COWARDLEEEE!"


In a comic released in America on the 4th of July. Probably not an accident. Just sayin', it am make me unproud. And who doesn't love the bizarro-justice leaguers??? Probably nobody. There's also this nice scene where Supes is trying to get help and Bizarro leads the other bizarros in mocking him.




All in all, a great issue. Not the best in the series, but still solidly atop the piles that are rolling out of DC


In the world of music, I'll take a little narcissistic bent. Tony, of my favorite local promotions/record label Reverse Retro, put up the end of my first set as DJSNESDS. In this project I use Super Nintendos as turntables, switching out cartriges of Mario Paint and various other games. I use my Nintendo DS and Electroplankton to overlay more music. This video is hitting at the end of my set, where Electroplankton is distorting a sampled scream. I'll be doing this again soon.



At the very end you can catch a little of the last Mario Paint beat I made, "I Love Sarah A." The song is named after the saved picture that was on the used cartridge when i bought it, but one of the two members of the Lucky Dragons (whom I was opening for) is named Sarah Anderson. Fun people, fun show.

Also, The Moon Knights (a band I drum for) is featred on the Dresden Dolls MySpace Page. We are performing a cover of their song Delilah, and they apparently liked it. You can see me watching 28 days later at this New Year's Eve party, waiting for my cue. Thanks Dresden Dolls!!!


FINISH HIM!!!!

Next time on The Effete Bomb, Silver Surfer #8 (1988), Smashing Pumpkins-"Zeitgeist", High Places-"Golden", and probably more. Thanks for bearing with me through my first blog post. Also, if you live in Anchorage, I'll hopefully see you at Del tha Funky Homosapien this Friday, July 13th @ 9PM.